Mom and dad are so cute!

Remembering mom and dads anniversary

My mom and dad are still married even though they are not together anymore in life. I have to keep telling myself that even though its a really easy concept. Sunday will be 35 years. My advice to anyone would be to enjoy your relationships now because you just don't know when there could be a temporary separation. My heart has been hurting a lot lately if I let myself go there. I think missing someone is one of the strongest emotions you can experience. I love my mom and dad and can't wait until they are together again!

It feels heavy right now.

Mom is coming to my mind a lot lately I feel sad often. I think it must be the time of year or something in the air. I have heard all my siblings tell me they are not doing well right now. I feel so sad, so sad the I'm having another baby that my mom is not here on earth to see. I want her to be here. I know that this spirit that is coming is with her now but It does not comfort me right now. I just want to talk to her and see her. I hope that we will all be together again soon... I am usually trying to see the good in why she had to go... but not today, today I feel sad and mad and lonely, It makes me feel like someone has played the a very mean joke on me and I just want it to all go away. I think it is good to feel what you are feeling and not cover it up and pretend it does not hurt. Because dang it, it does hurt and my heart feels beaten in. Mom why did you have to go?? I hope to find these answers out soon... I'm going to go fall asleep now and dream of her!! sorry so sad

Grandma and Grandpa

These are my wonderful grandparents and my moms parents. We are so blessed to have them in our lives. Mom loves you Grammy and Grampy!

Man these are some cute kids...

What beautiful Grandchildren, I think they must have gotten there good looks from one

b-e-a-utiful Grandmother... We love you mom and Grandma!!

Family Reunion

Well this year its moms turn to head up the family reunion, it was her idea to start the annual reunions on the Record side of the family. She did not even get to attend one of them. We have struggled wanting to be a part of it with her not here. This year we have decided as siblings that we want to represent mom and be in charge of the plans for everyone. We know that is what she wants us to do. The hardest part is when the moms and dads of their families get up and introduce their children and grandchildren...to see their excitement and pride at what they have created. Its just so hard because I know how proud mom would be of us her 4 children and 10 grandchildren. She would beam with joy as she introduced all of us. One of the hardest things has been not to be a part of a family with a mom and dad at the head of it. But we will move on and represent her with pride and joy and we will just have to be proud of ourselves. I know we can do it. Life is about hard things making you stronger.

A new normal

I can remember when my mom left I thought to myself how can I possibly go on without her. Well you just go to bed and wake up and your still here and you do the best with that day that you know how to.
I miss my morning phone call and the feeling that I had when my family was all gathered together. I miss her holding my kids and looking at them with such love in her eyes. I miss seeing my mom and dad together. Its weird how you get used to things and what you thought was impossible is possible. My mom is helping me I know she calms me down and puts thoughts in my head to help me cope.
I think about that day that we see eachother again and when the pain of her absence with be gone. I can't wait. Maybe it will be sooner than later. Thats a happy thought. Love you mom