March 12 was the day my mom passed away 2 years ago. Oh boy what a hard day to get through, I mean every day seems challenging, some days are way worse than others. Its hard to think back to that awful day 2 years ago.... The things I had to see and feel where indescribable. You know I wanted her to be out of her pain and away from the body that stopped working for her. At the same time I did not want her to leave me. I would lay by her and sing hymns to her hoping that this would comfort her in some way. I also sat there and whispered to her in her ear that its "Its ok mom you can go we will be o.k. " The nurse said that maybe she was hanging on for us, and we needed to tell her that we would be ok. I also just wanted to hear her tell me she loved me one more time, not that I didn't here this like 50 million times in my life cause I did. My mom always told me how wonderful I am and how much she loves me every time we talked. She used to say "Jenny your so amazing, you can do anything." Man how awesome that she thought I was so great!! There are lots of memories I have of that day most of them sad. After she passed, I left the house by my self so I could cry alone. I said to her in my head," Mom why did you have to go, I miss you." And then as clear as day I heard in my head her answer me and say, " I did all I was supposed to do," Then I said in my head, " I love you mom" and she answered me back saying, " I love you too" It was a really amazing moment for me. I still feel her around me at times. Sometimes I'll be sitting there and I swear there is someone behind me or by me. She did tell me when she was very sick, "I don't know how it all works up there, but I will be with you as much as I can."

When my mom and I would see each other I was always really silly with her, I loved to make her laugh. I would tickle her, (she is so ticklish, ) I always used to pick her up cause I was alot taller than her and she was always so skinny. She would laugh, and scream it was so much fun. I think about when I see her again sometimes, I think I will pick her up and she will laugh and we will laugh and it will be a sweet reunion. (Thank you for listening)

I miss you

There hasn't been anything posted in such a long time I had to get on and say how much I miss you mom. It doesn't get easier and it doesn't go away how much I want things to be back the way they were. I still can't believe we have to go on living without mom. Everyone else moves on and the sting goes away but for the people closest it never leaves. I guess thats what the definition of a trial is. At least I can say when I get up to heaven to some of those great prophets and people up there that I have gone through the depths of what life can bring you and I am worthy to be with them because of the pains and trials I had to go through in life. Hopefully I am learning and growing, although it doesn't always feel that way. Miss you and love you mom.

MEMORIES OF CHRISTINE

Today we celebrate the day that a beautiful soul came into this world and changed our lives. As I thought about Christine today, I decided to go back to the beginning and ask Mom and Dad what they remember about this day, 56 years ago.





Mom - It began about 3 or so in the morning, Mom had to call Dad at work because he was working graveyard shift and wasn't there. She said "you better come home and take me to the hospital". Grandma Record came over to stay with David, Mike and Susan. Her labor lasted about 5 or 6 hours, about normal she said. She does remember that Dad fell kept falling asleep between contractions. When it was time to deliver Dad was sent to the waiting room with all the other fathers and Mom went off to the delivery room, all by herself. Our beautiful Christine was born about 8:00 am. She was 5 lbs and 13 oz and had more hair than any of the rest of us, and it was curly. She was adorable. After the delivery Mom's uterus wouldn't contract so the Dr. sat by her bed and massaged for hours. When he had to leave the nurse took over, they were afraid she would hemorage. That was a very painful ordeal and she felt awful and apparently look about the same. Grandma Ruff left the hospital and cried all the way home. But by the time Grandma Ruff came back that evening with something cute and pink for Christine, Mom was sitting up in bed with her makeup on, feeling and looking much better.





Dad - "I don't remember much....I was tired". (We love you Dad!)





I don't remember that day obviously because I wasn't born yet, but I know I was in heaven feeling very sad because I was saying goodbye to my best friend and sister. But happy at the same time because I knew I would be seeing her again, very soon. Just how I feel now, so very sad that I had to say goodbye to my best friend and sister but confident that she's in a beautiful place with all of our loved ones that have gone before her, and I will see her again. Happy Birthday Christine, I love you.

56th birthday

I got the number wrong its 56th birthday love you mom.

Happy Birthday Mom!

Today is mom's 55th birthday. I miss you so much mom. Happy Birthday my beautiful mom. We love you.

He's home

Casey brought such a nice spirit back with him. Its great to have him home. The stake president told me that he thinks that mom was very needed with Casey on his mission and that now that he is home we will feel her presence more. I think that is true and I have definately felt a nice peace and happiness with his return. Miss you mom.

Missing you

Casey is coming home tomarrow. These last few days have been hard. I have dreamt about mom everynight. We have all anticipated this reunion and hoped that mom would be a part of it. I know she will be there. I wish it was physically. I was thinking about the fullness of joy and I think you cannot feel that in your life as long as someone is missing. We will not feel that again until we are all reunited. Its happy and we love to be together but there is always someone missing. I miss you mom I hope we will feel your presence with us as casey comes home.