Monday, November 24, 2008


Today we celebrate the day that a beautiful soul came into this world and changed our lives. As I thought about Christine today, I decided to go back to the beginning and ask Mom and Dad what they remember about this day, 56 years ago.

Mom - It began about 3 or so in the morning, Mom had to call Dad at work because he was working graveyard shift and wasn't there. She said "you better come home and take me to the hospital". Grandma Record came over to stay with David, Mike and Susan. Her labor lasted about 5 or 6 hours, about normal she said. She does remember that Dad fell kept falling asleep between contractions. When it was time to deliver Dad was sent to the waiting room with all the other fathers and Mom went off to the delivery room, all by herself. Our beautiful Christine was born about 8:00 am. She was 5 lbs and 13 oz and had more hair than any of the rest of us, and it was curly. She was adorable. After the delivery Mom's uterus wouldn't contract so the Dr. sat by her bed and massaged for hours. When he had to leave the nurse took over, they were afraid she would hemorage. That was a very painful ordeal and she felt awful and apparently look about the same. Grandma Ruff left the hospital and cried all the way home. But by the time Grandma Ruff came back that evening with something cute and pink for Christine, Mom was sitting up in bed with her makeup on, feeling and looking much better.

Dad - "I don't remember much....I was tired". (We love you Dad!)

I don't remember that day obviously because I wasn't born yet, but I know I was in heaven feeling very sad because I was saying goodbye to my best friend and sister. But happy at the same time because I knew I would be seeing her again, very soon. Just how I feel now, so very sad that I had to say goodbye to my best friend and sister but confident that she's in a beautiful place with all of our loved ones that have gone before her, and I will see her again. Happy Birthday Christine, I love you.

56th birthday

I got the number wrong its 56th birthday love you mom.

Happy Birthday Mom!

Today is mom's 55th birthday. I miss you so much mom. Happy Birthday my beautiful mom. We love you.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

He's home

Casey brought such a nice spirit back with him. Its great to have him home. The stake president told me that he thinks that mom was very needed with Casey on his mission and that now that he is home we will feel her presence more. I think that is true and I have definately felt a nice peace and happiness with his return. Miss you mom.

Monday, November 3, 2008

Missing you

Casey is coming home tomarrow. These last few days have been hard. I have dreamt about mom everynight. We have all anticipated this reunion and hoped that mom would be a part of it. I know she will be there. I wish it was physically. I was thinking about the fullness of joy and I think you cannot feel that in your life as long as someone is missing. We will not feel that again until we are all reunited. Its happy and we love to be together but there is always someone missing. I miss you mom I hope we will feel your presence with us as casey comes home.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

35th wedding anniversary

October 18th was mom and dads 35 wedding anniversary. I wanted to acknowledge it. Happy Anniversary mom and dad!

Sunday, October 26, 2008

The countdown

9 days and counting.

Thursday, October 23, 2008


One of the hardest things that people say is that mom is a memory or that I have her in my memories. I want to shout out with all my voice and say she is not a memory she is real, she is happy, she is working hard and she is definately existing. I know this as surely as I know anything. Our relationships keep going even though we are separated for a time. Love you mom.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Spiritual thoughts to feed our souls!!!

I have been wanting to bring a little more spiritual meaning into my life, and decided to look online at some conference talks by our beloved apostles. I read these talks from Ezra Taft Benson and Pres. Monson, wanted to share with all of you. .........Life is eternal. We are eternal beings. We lived as intelligent spirits before this mortal life. We are now living part of eternity. Our mortal birth was not the beginning. Death, which faces all of us, is not the end.
As eternal beings, we each have in us a spark of divinity. As one who has traveled over much of this world, I am convinced that our Father’s children are essentially good. They want to live in peace. They want to be good neighbors. They love their homes and their families. They want to improve their standards of living. They want to do what is right, and I know that God loves them.There is the ever-present expectancy of death, but in reality there is no death—no permanent parting. The resurrection is a reality. The scriptures are replete with evidence. Almost immediately after the glorious resurrection of the Lord, Matthew records: “And the graves were opened; and many bodies of the saints which slept arose, And came out of the graves after his resurrection, and went into the holy city, and appeared unto many.” (Matt. 27:52–53.)
The spirit world is not far away. Sometimes the veil between this life and the life beyond becomes very thin. Our loved ones who have passed on are not far from us.
The prophet Brigham Young asked, “Where is the spirit world?” and then answered his own question:
“It is right here. … Do [spirits] go beyond the boundaries of this organized earth? No, they do not. They are brought forth upon this earth, for the express purpose of inhabiting it to all eternity.” (Journal of Discourses, 3:369.)
“When the spirits leave their bodies they are in the presence of our Father and God, they are prepared then to see, hear and understand spiritual things . … If the Lord would permit it, and it was His will that it should be done, you could see the spirits that have departed from this world, as plainly as you now see bodies with your natural eyes.” (Journal of Discourses, 3:368.) President Ezra Taft Benson “Death is not what some people imagine. It is only like going into another room. In that other room we shall find … the dear women and men and the sweet children we have loved and lost.”7 Pres. Monson

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Our boy is coming home!

Yes its almost time two long years have gone by and we are counting down 23 days to go. Casey will be coming home on November 4th. I know mom would be especially gitty right now for his return. Mom and Casey have a really special bond. I wonder if mom knows about and it and how she is feeling. We can't wait to have Casey back.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Our early family

I love this picture of our early family everyone looks so happy. Some of my favorite memories are of mom with big hair.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Not Gone

I don't feel that my mom is gone. I feel so strongly that she has stepped threw a door in the next room. I know she is close to us, she hears us and knows of our trials and hardships, with her gone. Its so hard to have the faith to see past our pain to something more, we will have the eternities to hug her, to listen to her sweet voice. I will be able to make her laugh for as long as I desire. She is not gone, please don't think this. She is right there, sometimes I sense her like she is next to me looking at me. Telling me my hair is beautiful, or how amazing she thinks I am. She loves us all so much, even more than she did on earth (if that is possible). We will see her soon, we all need to hold strong until that day!!


I was having some deep thoughts today about mom and about life I wanted to share them with you. There are lots of days that I spend the day thinking about what it would be like if mom were here, what would we be talking about, what plans would we be making and what new news would I be sharing with her. These days I feel down because of all the things I feel I don't have...... Life has many more challenges today than it did, this forces me everyday to dig deep and find the peace that seems to not be there, to find the comtentment that is missing. I discovered today that because of this daily search for peace and meaning that I may be more blessed than those without this driving force. I know more, I feel more, I am more. When mom passed I took one step into heaven with her because we are bound by being mother and daughter she is guiding me with all the knowledge that she now has. Today I feel lucky.

Monday, August 18, 2008

Memories of Home

Helping Tara prepare this blog has brought back many memories. Waves of sadness, love, and tenderness have crashed down on my soul, loosing floodgates of tears so often held back in order to strengthen others. Yet, Chris's memory, especially many of my first ones of her, still the tears and bring peace to my soul. I love you Chris! Oh how I wish I had said it more often when she was here; but I know she knew how much. Tears still well up like great reservoirs of regret when I wish I could have been with her at the end. I digress. I do not wish to think of the end - but the beginning. Chris, you hold a special place in my heart. You were truly a mother to me. Coming to visit always felt like coming home.

Since Chris left, I have been blessed to feel her near on a few occassions. During one blessing in particular that I was giving Tara, I not only felt her next to me but I knew her thoughts and felt her feelings. I have never felt anything that spiritual so strong before or since. The spirit overwhelmed me, and I KNEW how much she loves her children. I can say of assurety that she loves her family, that she is aware of your thoughts, your feelings, and your events. I look forward to the day I embrace her again, and hope that I on that day I will make her proud of me for the life I have led. I know it will feel like coming home.

Love - Joe

Sunday, August 17, 2008